HOOK: E-zine By, For, and About Men in the Sex Industry

You want money. No. You need money. The clients aren't calling at the rate that you wanted them to. The regulars might be on vacation. Your ad continues to run while the city shuts its sexlife down for a few weeks and that leaves you out in the cold. What can you do?

I am sitting with a 20-year-old in a sandwich shop who is explaining the current state of escorting in the city for him. Regular clients. The process. The way that being the new kid on the block is wearing off after three months or so. We have had the same clients, of course. The same fetishes. The same good tips. When the subject comes up, he gives me a look after his comments dissipate in to the lunch hour traffic. He says, "Sometimes, it is rough now, 'cause when I first started, I was getting a lot of calls and I thought, 'I can do this full time!' But it has been slow, and I don't know what to do. You do what you can sometimes to get or keep a client when you don't have much choice."

Maybe you can understand my concerns. It usually happens to us all - those long slow seasons - and we need to know some good ways to go through them. Here are some tips and pointers to not just getting through them, but on how to prevent them from even happening.

First, don't sacrifice the deals you have made for myself. What I mean by this is maintain your boundaries, your rules. Some guys won't kiss. Others won't bottom. Others won't give head without a condom. Some won't do outcalls. These are contracts that you make with yourself - like little deals to allow you to accept the kind of business you are in. You should never cross that boundary because of financial need. For many of us, it puts us at a risk of feeling down about the work we do. Once you set your limits, stick to them.

Second, you are in a service industry so it may be feast or famine. At times, you will have so many clients that trying to determine what to do with them all will be a little difficult. Other times, like when the city gets in a rut, holiday seasons (though, those can be boosts, too) and vacation season can be a real challenge. The most obvious way to prevent any worries during slow seasons is to save up. Some guys have three accounts - one for regular banking, one for taxes, and a rainy day fund just for those long weeks when there is no cash coming in and no food on the table. Starting to save during those heavy periods will allow you to coast comfortably through the harsh ones.

Third, keeping good client relationships is a bonus for all needs. Maintaining some professional distance, you also let the client get to feel invested in you and you can ensure they keep coming back. Tthat means regular income for you even through slow seasons. Again, though, remember to hold to your own 'contract' even if the regular client is trying to push you over that line. You are running a business and you have obligations to yourself that were obviously important to you. No regular client is worth crossing that boundary with yourself.

Fourth, finding the client instead of them finding you. Two really good ways people have used (though one I find far more favorable than the other) to secure new clients in rough times have been through online chatrooms and phone sex chat lines. Going online to chatrooms and talking to people, some going for the more direct approach of putting escort, rentboy, etc. in their nickname, can do very well. And if you aren't there often, it can be a good resource. The second location is a bit more underhanded and likely to get you more unwanted attention. By going on phone sex lines, some guys have done the private chat with guys getting them all hot and bothered and then breaking the news that they are 'paid lovers.' This sometimes works, and most often, doesn't. It can be met very negatively and also, should that person report you, could get you in a fair amount of trouble.

Finally, a couple other alternatives to making quick money can be modeling for art classes at local colleges (they are always looking for men) and dancing at local clubs (even straight ones are looking for well-built musclemen to keep the ladies attentive and interested since most of the frat boys can't always do that - so ask around). Also, check with places like lingerie demo places and female strip clubs if they have any male only nights. Those can be lucrative and introduce you to new clientele. Also, you might make some great connections for that long, slow season that can be a short one or non-existent.